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It's the customer, stupid

It’s not about you – it’s about them. Don’t ever forget it.

Its the customer, stupid | writing marketing communication | copywriter

A few months back, a pop-up popped up in Skype.

Would you like to win £1,000? it trilled. Of course I would. I was excited at the prospect – positively thrilled, in fact.

All I had to do, it explained, was complete an online survey that would help them improve the program. It would only take a few minutes.

I jumped at the chance.

Several long minutes later, I was losing heart. The questions were endless, and all began to resemble each other. I was answering on autopilot, ticking yes and no randomly, awarding 5 out of 10, or neutral when it came to agreeing or disagreeing – anything, as long as I could just get to the end of this damn thing.

You’re almost there! it gushed. Except I wasn’t. Another screenful of questions taunted me. That thousand quid was disappearing faster than a carrot on telescopic stick.

And finally, I snapped.

In a fit of pique, I closed the browser, brought my clenched fist down on my desk (ouch – don’t try this at home) and had a double espresso to calm down (ditto).

So what went wrong? Simple: Skype needed some info, so they found a cheap way to do it. They dangled the lure of £1,000 in front of me, and like a goggle-eyed fish, I bit.

But here’s where they went wrong: they thought it was about them.

It wasn’t. It was about me.

After a few dozen questions, I didn’t care about the money anymore. Easy money should be…well, easy. And it wasn’t.

It wasn’t even money – it was the chance to be entered into a draw. To win money. And even then, probably not money but Skype credit (no doubt to be used by a certain date).

Net result?

  • I didn’t win £1,000.
  • I didn’t even get a chance to win £1,000.
  • I wasted my time.
  • I felt more negative about Skype than before.
  • I resolved never to complete another survey.
  • (and worst of all) I felt used.

Not good.

Through the looking-glass

If you want to understand your customers, think like a customer. If you want to understand a reader, think like a reader.

Let’s take websites. Most have an About page. So what’s it about?

Wrong. It’s not about you (haven’t you been listening?).

It’s about them. Even when it’s about you. Everything you say – even when you’re talking about your company, your history, your people, your offices, your reputation, your fabulous dress sense and good looks – it’s about them.

What you say What you really mean
We’ve been in business 20 years. Relax. We know what we’re doing.
We have dedicated account managers. You don’t need to repeat yourself to some witless moron every time you phone us.
We have a one-stop service. You keep your costs down, you have less hassle, you can leave all the hair-pulling, desk-banging (ouch) details to us.
We pride ourselves on professionalism, service and [blah, blah, blah]. Yes – you did make the right choice. Now go to bed and stop worrying.

I Customer

Never write a word without thinking how it’ll be read. Never launch a marketing campaign without thinking how it’ll be received. And never call an offer special unless it’s just that – special.

With a bit of practice, it becomes second nature.

Some people, however, need more practice than others. Remember my Top 10? It included 3, the UK mobile phone operator. When I switched to them, they gave me £10 ($16, €11.50) free credit to be used within 30 days, just to thank me.

Wasn’t that nice?

Not really. You see, when I logged on on 3′s site, I saw that the credit had been ‘queued’. A little footnote told me that the credit would be used up in the order in which it was displayed.

And it was displayed in the last row of the table.

In other words, my free credit would be used only when my paid-for credit was gone. And if that didn’t happen in 30 days, the freebie would disappear.

Free? Schmee.

Don’t think like a marketer. Think like like a marketee. Don’t think like a writer. Think like a writee.

Aka reader.

Happy writing.

September 4th, 2009 | Category: Communication, Marketing, Writing | Leave a comment

First impressions really do matter

Take the time to get it right – you’ll be glad you did

OK, it’s time for a tea break. You’ve been working way too hard, so kick back, put your feet up and let’s have some green tea.

But which one? Well today, I have two for you to choose from.

Here’s number 1:

First impressions really do matter | marketing communication | copywriter

And here’s number 2:

First impressions really do matter | marketing communication | copywriter

Quick! Don’t think about it. Don’t rationalise. Just make a split-second decision.

1 or 2?

If you’re anything like me (and if so, you have my condolences) you’ll instantly plump for number 2.

Why? Because it’s jaunty, slightly irregular, and looks less corporate. It’s got a left-of-centre, independent-thinker, doesn’t-follow-the-crowd feel about it.

And yet it’s the very same tea: Clipper Green Tea with Lemon. It recently underwent a makeover and now looks more funky, fun and friendly.

Note, by the way, that v2 has lost the Fairtrade logo from the front of the box (it’s tucked away elsewhere). Why? Well probably because it wasn’t so important to green tea drinkers.

And how did the Clipper people know that? Simple. They asked their customers (revolutionary, I know). They cheekily slipped this card into the old boxes, and enticed people with a bagful of goodies:

First impressions really do matter | marketing communication | copywriter

And they got their answer.

The shock of the new

Shopping online or off is a confusing experience. We look for signs – indicators that tell us what to think, what to do, how to behave. We look for patterns, because they make us feel safe.

We look for the familiar.

Take books. Now we all know we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but we all do – whether we like it or not.

Let’s do another test. It’s time for some 19th century bodice-ripping. Which of these two books would you rather read?

This one:

First impressions really do matter | marketing communication | copywriter

Or this one:

First impressions really do matter | marketing communication | copywriter

The first is sure to be heavy going: long sentences, archaic language and  detailed intrigue.

And the second? Well that’s a bit…Bridget Jones-like, isn’t it? A bit chick-lit, girl-about-town, we-all-know-what-she-really-wants.

And of course, it’s exactly the same novel, word for word.

Up close and personal

Let’s take a big company. A big, serious, behemoth of an organisation, with branches all over the world.

Unilever: it’s an umbrella company for brands that touch the lives of people across the globe. It could – like so many other parent companies – have a bland, dowdy, corporate feel.

But it doesn’t. Just check out their brands page.

The whole site has a light and airy feel, with splashes of colour and playful graphics. And everywhere, but everywhere, people are smiling.

Who would have thought that washing up was so much fun? Or doing the laundry? Or brushing your teeth?

What’s your first impression? And how does it compare with Dupont? Not as favourably, does it?

Granted, Dupont’s product range isn’t as consumer-oriented as Unilever (don’t you just love the promise on their home page: Spend less time on insect control…) but they could still make it more attractive.

First things first

When your first impression could be your only one, it’s worth making the effort.

Think of somebody you don’t particularly like. Chances are you didn’t like them on sight.

Why?

Often, it’s not easy to explain. Maybe they dressed down, or up, or in an old-fashioned way. Perhaps they looked you up and down or scored points at your expense. They may have said something – or forgotten to say something.

And that was it – you formed a first impression. However hard you’ve tried, you can’t shake it off.

Well, it’s the very same with your company, your brand, your products, your service. It’s what happens with everything you do, say, write, present, include and exclude.

You create an impression. And that can take just a split second.

When somebody reads your home page, opens your brochure, talks to you on the phone, hears about you from a friend or sees your AdWord, what’s the first thing they think?

First impressions count – because first impressions last. It could be your one and only chance to gain somebody’s attention and trust.

Make sure you don’t waste it.

April 24th, 2009 | Category: Communication, Marketing | Leave a comment

The power of storytelling

We all do it – so why not use it to your advantage?

The power of storytelling | technology marketing ideas | copywriter

Did you blow out over Christmas? Wine, beer, sherry, turkey, mince pies, Christmas pudding, cakes, chocolates, and lots of yummy cheese?

If you did, perhaps you’ve blown up too. And you’ve seen the inevitable New Year, new you! headlines in the glossy weekend supplements. So maybe you’re thinking about turning over a new leaf.

And what better way to do it than a detox?

Well here’s a newsflash: detox doesn’t exist.

UK charitable trust Sense About Science recently investigated 15 detox products from bottled water to face scrub. And their conclusions? The detox claims, they said, are “meaningless”.

We’d be better off, according to them, eating healthily and getting a good night’s sleep.

Their claims caused a furious debate. I heard one myself, on BBC radio.

On one side, a spokeswoman for Sense About Science. On the other, a woman who’d been through a five-day detox, and said the results were amazing.

So who’s right?

They both are.

The scientists are right because the science is undeniable. But the detox fans are right because they believe they’re right. They’ve told themselves that detox exists – so it does.

It’s their story, and they’re sticking to it.

Tell (a story), don’t show

We all tell ourselves stories.

I do (I’ve even got some ‘detox tea’ in my cupboard to prove it). You do. Everybody does. It’s part of who we are and how we function.

It’s something Seth Godin explores in his addictive (in a good way) book All Marketers Are Liars. It’s packed full of examples of how we tell ourselves stories about everything. That’s our way of justifying purchases, cutting through the clutter of choice, and making ourselves feel good.

Often, we use stories to deceive ourselves. Here are just a few examples I picked up on recently:

  • A woman at my gym who spends £30 an hour (her membership only costs £35 a month) once a week to chat to her personal trainer. She’s told herself she’s working harder, that it’s easier when you’ve got somebody motivating you, that it gives her structure and purpose. But it doesn’t. In six months, to my inexpert eye, she’s lost no weight. If anything, she’s gained weight.
  • Two acquaintances of mine who proudly announced that they’re self-diagnosed dyslexics. Their spelling is pretty bad, but it’s easier to blame it on a medical condition than do something about it.
  • An art gallery in Melbourne that gushed with enthusiasm over a new artist, until they discovered she was only two years old.

OK, these examples are frivolous, but they prove a serious point.

People aren’t looking for facts. They’re looking for a story. And it’s a hugely powerful marketing tactic you can use to your advantage.

The plot thickens

Let’s be clear here: we’re not talking about deceiving people. If you market something using deceptive practices, you’ll be found out – every time.

Instead, what you need to do is put yourself inside the mind of your potential customer. What stories do they tell themselves? What, in the words of the Wise One (Seth), is their worldview?

Find out that, and you know how to talk to them.

Why do people pay what they do for works of art? An art dealer friend put it very succinctly to me:

“Art isn’t ‘worth’ anything,” she said. “It’s simply an agreed point on a spectrum, usually midway between the buyer and seller.”

In other words, they tell themselves a story. If they didn’t, how would they justify paying (or charging) a fortune for pickled sharks and unmade beds?

Baby on board stickers work because it bypasses the need for speed and appeals to people’s parental instincts. The same goes for safety cameras (the new name for – you guessed it – speed cameras in the UK).

Once you know what’s important to people, you can look at your product or service from their point of view – using their vocabulary and terms of reference.

Or put another way, tell them a story.

So what’s your story?

Find out more:

February 3rd, 2009 | Category: Ideas, Marketing, Technology | Leave a comment
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